Susy's Blog

Well, so far, so good... the people that I've met from Neil's family seem to like me... that's a good thing. I've met two of his sisters, one brother, and his Mom so far. In fact his Mom said that I gave off good vibes, that I had good teeth (what am I a horse), and that I reminded her of Pollyanne (or that I look liek Pollyanne). I didn't know who Pollyanne was, but apparently she's off of an old disney movie...
Also, his sister refered to me as her sister. That's cool. So yeah they all seem to like me and I can't remeber what i wanted to write.. I was thinking about it but i've forgotten what I thought of, but at least I'm getting my point across...

Okay maybe there is a bit of a resemblence between me and Pollyanne. lol
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Persian Sufi connected to the Suhrawardiyya order. -- Islam

Love
Every word of every tongue is
Love telling a story to her own ears.
Every thought in every mind,
She whispers a secret to her own Self.
Every vision in every eye,
She shows her beauty to her own sight.
Every smile on every face,
She reveals her own joy for herself to enjoy.
Love courses through everything,
No, Love is everything.
How can you say, there is no love,
when nothing but love exists?
All that you see has appeared becasue of Love.
All shines from love,
All pulses with Love,
All flows from love--
No, once again, all is love!

It is God you Love
...Although you may not know it,
If you love anyone, it is Him you love;
If you turn your head in any direction,
it is toward him you turn.
...In the light I praised you
and never knew it.
In the dark I slept with you
and never knew it.
I always thought that I was me,
But no, I was you
and never knew it.
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Persian Mystic and Poet
Even on the Path to God, All is God
-- Islam --

You are freed from your own desires only when God frees you. This is not effected by your own exertion, but by the grace of God. First he brings forth in you the desire to attain this goal. Then he opens to you the gate of repentance. Then...You continue to strive and... Pride yourself upon your efforts, thinking that you are advancing or achieving something; but afterward you fall into despair and feel no joy. Then you know your work is not pure but tainted, you repent of acts of devotion which you had thought were your own, and perceive that they were done by God's grace and that you were guilty of polytheism in attributing them to your own exertion. When this becomes manifest, a feeling of joy enters your heart... God opens to you the gate of love...

But still you think "I love" and find no rest until you perceive that it is God who loves you and keeps you in the state of loving, and that this is the result of divine love and grace, not of your own endeavor. Then God opens to you the gate of unity,a nd causes you to know that all action depends on God Almighty. Hereupon you perceive that all is God, and all is by him, and all is his [even] this self-conceit... Then you entirely recognize that you do not have the right to say "I" or "mine." At this stage you behold free and calm. You desire what God desires; your own desires are gone, you are emancipated from your wants, and have gained peace and joy in both worlds.

First, action is necessary, then knowledge, in order that you may know that you know nothing and are no one. This is not easy to know that you know. It is a thing that cannot be rightly learned by instruction, nor sewed on with needle nor tied on with thread. It is the gift of God.
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Guess what I learned in World Religions today...
That if you wet your hands before you cut onions you won't cry!
Because onions go directly to where ever there's moisture, there's moisture in your eyes. So by wetting your hands you prevent your eyes from watering.
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In a good way
I think it's a good thing when you can spend a lot of time with somebody and it doesn't feel like a lot of time, in fact the time goes by quite fast. You don't even have to do much of anything.

Yes, by now you've probably all read the "15 hours" post, so have heard about Neil. Well, what do I say? I've mentioned how sweet he is, have I mentioned that I feel like I can tell him anything. Okay, maybe I don't quite tell him everything that's on my mind yet. But I can see myself getting there, and I would like that, I would be comfortable and he's understanding. Yes it's a "honeymoon stage" and yes we're google eyes at each other. And know what... he tells me what he's thinking and he says it's really weird because he wouldn't normally tell anybody that much.

My parents and brother say he seems like a good nice guy... yes they've met him (and we've only had 3 dates). Jimmy says he like that Neil seems confortable with the family, and my Dad says he wants to drive Neil's truck. They did not get much of a chance to really meet him and get to know him, but they say that I appear happy (I am).

What can I say? we have fun together, we have a lot in common (he loves Family Guy! :-) ).
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I know I haven't been blogging as much as usual, it's because I've been fairly busy with school, work, homework, and friends. I don't feel busy, I just know I don't have a lot of spare time on my hands... But I'm okay with that. I actually worked a full time week, although it looks like things might slow down a little for a couple weeks (work wise). What really matters is that I'm enjoying things.

Now what's up with that "15 hours" title you say? Well... I was with somebody for 15 hours yesterday, and we never got bored of each other... We had a lot of fun. We had lunch, did a lot of talking, played pool, had dinner, attempted to go to the Imax but it was sold out so we rented a movie instead. I swear we didn't stop smiling or laughing for more than 15 minutes. Course I'm pumping in the coffee to stay awake today, because I only got about 4 hours sleep... But o well.Yes it was a boy...
and I know I may be teased I(especially by Mom... Or wait she did that already), but I don't care :-) He's a sweet gentleman... Funny thing is I didn't really want to mention the person I was with was a him... Because of the teasing thing...Notice how, before now, I didn't put in any gender qualifying words.. And how I wrote this part in a smaller font :-p

Another thing, is that even though I've been busy with not just school, I haven't fallen behind... Mind you I'm not ahead either (as usual). But I can't really work ahead in my classes this semester... Because I have something due every weekend... Whether it's reading or a paper. But I am keeping up, which is a good thing.
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I need a children's story book, suitable for preschoolers, about the story of Samson.... if anybody has one I can borrow please let me know before sunday.
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The Androgynous Nana-Buluku (Fon, West Africa)

The world was created by one god, who is at the same time both male and female. This Creator is neither Mawu or Lisa, but is named Nana-Buluku. In time, Nana-Buluku gave birth to twins, who were named Mawu and Lisa, and to whom eventually dominion over the real thus created ceded. To Mawu, the woman, was given command of the night; to Lisa, the man, command of the day. Mawu, therefore, is the moon and inhabits the west, while Lisa, who is the sun, inhabits the east. At the time their respective domains were assigned to them, no children had as yet been born to this pair, though at night the man was in the habit of giving a "rendezvous" to the woman, and eventually she bore him offspring. This is why, when there is an eclipse of the moon, it is said the celestial couple are engaged in love-making; when there is an eclipse of the sun, Mawu is believed to be having intercourse with Lisa.

I thought it was interesting... and now you all can think of this myth when you see an eclipse.
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After work yesturday me and a couple co-workers decided that we wanted to go hang out... we went to Boston Pizza for dinner. And decided we weren't ready to go home yet

so... we went to wonderland (or sorry, it's not called that anymore... Castle Fun Park)...but on the way there we passed this lady pulled over to the side of the street. she jumped out as we passed seeming to try and get our attention. We stopped, put the truck in reverse and checked to see if she was okay... she seemed to be alright, she didn't mention that her car was broke down. But she told us a long drawn out story, as she was almost in tears. I didn't quite understand what she was trying to tell us because her story seemed to keep on changing. She mentioned something about her 4 year old son who was at home.... i think he was home alone. but she also mentioned something about a car seat... and something about wanting to find an open church in Abbotsford... but she needed gas money or something.... like i said I didn't get it

But we gave her some money, we only had about $10 all together
As we were driving away we mentioned how we may have just given her some crack money.
Kind of a weird event
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I was working alongside my manager for a bit at work tonight, we got to talking about how I'm going to school and how I'm in the counselling program at Columbia Bible College. He then said "you're a Christan then" I said "yea" and he replied, with a smile on his face, "when I looked into your eyes, i could tell "
How cool is that!
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Willpower will never succeed in dealing with the deeply ingrained habits of sin. Emmet Fox writes "As soon as you resist mentally any undesirable or unwanted circumstance, you thereby endow it with more power -- power which it will use against you, and you will have depleted your own resources to that exact extent." Heini Arnold concludes, "As long as we think we can save ourselves by our own will power, we will only make the evil in us stronger than ever." This same truth has been experienced by all the great writers of the devotional life from St. Augustine to St. Francis, from John Calvin to John Wesley, from Teresa of Avila to Juliana of Norwich.
-From Celebration of Disciple, by Richard J. Foster
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I finally got my grade report form from Fall 2004
If your interrested, you can see them on my grades page.
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I was sitting on the couch when my dog, Aussie, started to rub her into the carpet
She does this quite often, I don't really know why... But what she does is stick her bum in the air and her head on the ground and rub... It's kinda funny... She does this when she's hyper.
But when she did this she was right in front of me so when she brought her head back up she came to me and I went to go pet her when my finger touched her nose and gave her an electric shock. We both just jumped back a bit, it didn't hurt her just took her off guard for a second... So sure enough she rubbed her head into the carpet again
But this time when she brought her head back up I purposely touched her nose to give her a little shock
kinda silly, but it was funny
She's so cute
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I seem to take on a different personality when I think and speak Spanish.
I realized this after I read Chapter 10 out of my Psychology book about thinking and language... it mentioned a little about how this is true for other people too... not just weirdos like me :-)

Cool thing is I can do a short Psych paper on that one, I have to do four papers dealing with any of stuff in the nine chapters we have to read.

It wasn't until I felt inspired to write a poem, the words came to me in Spanish... after I wrote them down I thought "weird, I'm a hopeless romantic in Spanish... but when I write in English I don't write about what I write about in Spanish"
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I thought I would have to work outside in the parking lot today at Tradex... but when I got there at 11am I was told that they were bringing in all of the parking staff because it was too cold outside. So I didn't even have to spend a half an hour outside. Instead we were given different tasks, some shoveled the sidealks and walkways, one person did crosswalk (but was changed every hour or so), and I was told to help out in the kitchen...
I didn't even know how to get into the kitchen, and I soon found out that there was no kitchen staff beside the supervisor (no shows). So I leanrned a lot, and we were really busy... i guess the people at the event didn't want to go out to eat (makes sense). It wasn't hard or anything, we just made tons of sanwiches, wraps hot dogs, soup, and so on... we ended up with about 6 people in the kitchen, only two had ever worked in the kitchen before. There was me (parking), the head hanuch of the Tradex, and another supervisor type person at Tradex. We had to be told how to do every littel thing, as well as where everything was... I'm surprised the kitchen supervisor didn't get stressed out, she was a lot of fun.
I was expecting it to be all uptight and picky like at Tim Hortons (where you feel like a lowly slave). But it was nothing like that, yeah they follow food safe rules but that just common sense... they are laid back and have fun... Now I know why I like my job so much (as if i never knew before), but even though it's grunt work it's still fun and I enjoy it because of the people and the bosses.
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Saw the coolest thing today... better than a snowman (much much better). While on the bus driving down South Fraser way, by one of the malls, close to the street. Somebody had carved out a face in a snow pile... it's fairly big, and it's really good.
It's hard to describe but it's tounge is rolled out onto the crosswalk, and the face looks like a vammpire.
I just wish I had a camera on me. It's worth a looksy
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I woke up, took a shower, then decided to listen to Star FM to see if my college was on the list of school's closed... I didn't hear anything... So I checker their website, I didn't see anything.
I decided to wait and listen to the news at 8am because they said they would announce more school's, the did the news, they did this, they did that and they just kept saying they would announce the schools after this.... I couldn't wait any longer, if I did I would miss my bus... So I turned off the radio and literally ran down to the bus station at the library
I saw a sign posted on one of the bus stop poles that said the busses were not going to make it up the hill, so the new bus stop was at the West Coast Express station. SO I ran down there... I remember that I had forgotten my lunch and I am working until 5 or something tonight (outside!!)... But the good thing is my folks were just walking to the car and I saw them so I yelled to my Dad to bring my lunch. (saved from starvation :-) ).

All of the buses were late so I didn't get to school until about 9:30 (when my class started). I saw a friend on the bus, she said that she had called the switchboard and that my teacher had not reported in, so the class was still on (even though he lives in Sardis) and that the school is still open. BUT when we got inside the school I walked into an empty class room and saw a note on the board that said "Psychology cancelled, Carrie's stuck in a snow drift"
Alright then, I walked back to my friend's locker were she was taking off her boots and putting on runners and told her, we both sighed because it was our only class for today... But oh well, I have to work today in Abbotsford anyway, and there's no in in going back to Mission because by the time I get back I'll just have to come back to abby for work... So yeah, I'm hanging out in the Collegium for about an hour.
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I felt like I was in highschool again today at school, while in a class
I got to the class, noticed I didn't know anybody, they were all younger than me and new residents (or so it appeared), so I sat down at an empty table. Ever sit down at an empty table just to see if anybody will join you?? Nobody joined me, it was kinda depressing and I really felt sorry for myself... that sucks. Even worse was when other students started taking chairs away from my table and moving themt o the next table... man that really made me feel like a reject... (maybe it's silly, but I even felt like i could cry... though I didn't).

One of the teachers seemed to notice this (I didn't know the teacher either, and there were 3 teachers), so she looked at me in a fake confiused look moving her arms in a way that seemed to say "What's up with that?"
Funny thing is I wasn't completely sure she was talking to me

The class started and one of the teachers announced their rules... "four people per table, and nobody's back can face them" (the tables are round table, we are in the dinning room overflow room). So I ended up sitting with three other people I recognized from another class, and one of the girls seemd to recognize me as she said "oh hey, how are you?" As she sat down beside me and gave me a light slap on the leg.

But that sucks, and even worse we had to get into "Spiritual Friendship Groups" of three people. Where throughout the semester we are supposed to keep each other accountable and meet weekly and share each other's spiritual walks... cool idea, but i'm with strangers... and knowing myself, it takes me time to really open up.
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I hate it, it's cold, it's cold and it's freezing cold
Especially when you are travelling by bus and you sometimes have no choice but to wait for a bus outside, without any form of shelter, and for half an hour... it's horrible... I'm just starting to feel my feet again (and i'm wearing two pairs of socks).
I hate the cold
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A Helen Keller quote

Good quote and I like it, but I just looked at it again tonight and thought that it sounds like denial.
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Turns out I am only $1000 in debt, and that's the brother loan... sure I only have less than $20.00 in my bank now, but at least I don't have to worry about paying interest.
I still have one more textbook to buy, but I'm buying it second hand from a friend at school who said if he can find it he will sell it to me for $10.00 (originally about $25.00). See the sidebar

As a side note...
I had a lot of running around to do for school today... I left at 8am thinking I had a class at 9:25am... but apparently it doesn't start until Thursday. I showed up to the classroom (first I had to find it, room "DRO" -- "dining Room Overflow"), but there was nobody there and the doors were locked. I thought, well it is the first day maybe nobody knows where the class is or they are late... I decide to come back in five minutes. I came back later to the same situation. Except this time I stood around the door, then another guy waiting for the same class approaches me. It looked like it was just the two of us, we waited about 5 minutes when he decided to look at the schedule only to discover that class started Thursday.
Oh well... I left to pay for my courses

I had to pay in three different methods (cheque, Visa, and Debit). I was able to pay with cheque and Visa and the cashier updated my account, but a second later the power went out. I couldn't pay for the rest of my account until about an hour later when the power came back on... I just hung around and talked to friends.

When I got back home I decided I would go down to Timmy's with my Mom so that I could do a bit more running around for school and buy some bus passes. But here's the frustrating part, I went to the library only to find some librarian who doesn't know a thing about bus passes... she said I couldn't get bus passes for college there... I've always gotten them there. I ended up taking the bus back to Abbotsford, to the UCFV bookstore... But I guess it worked out for my better because instead of paying $105 for a semester I paid $85... I got the UCFV price (I don't mind... besides I used to be a student there)

I only finally got home, had dinner, and now am able to relax.
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I was just approached by an interest free "Bank"
They offered to loan me $1000.00 interest free, obviously I accepted.
What's the name of this bank??
The Bank of Brother, commonly known as Jimmy

Yeah, he's pretty awesome.

He walked into my room a little while ago saying that he could act as a bank and loan me some monney and charge 0 interest. At first he said he'd have to go to the bank, so I would have to carry a wad load of money to school tomorrow. Then he thought about it and said he could write a cheque.
I didn't ask him if I could write about this, but how can I not? It just makes me so relieved.
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Note: my feeling monitor, in the sidebar
Not worried... Concerned
over finances, debt, school crap
I wrote practically the same thing in my description of my feeling

I've been trying to work out how much in debt I will be once I pay for school, and how long it might take to pay it off... There's not too much work coming up, so I'm hoping I will be able to pay off the debt quickly enough and without too much interest.

I know, I know, I know that God will provide... But that doesn't cast out my concern... Besides concern (even worry) can be a good thing... It can be a motivator....
but I think I will be picking up some Sunday shifts, so don't be surprised if I'm not in church some Sunday's.... (How's that for motivation)

As I see it there's only a few weekends the next few months at Tradex. That's only a few hundred dollars per month.

A good thing is that the times that I am working Kids Klub are the days when there are no events on a Sunday at Tradex... Except one (and only if the schedule remains as it was when Linda last sent it out). So I don't really know what I'll do there... Should I skip it and leave that week up to Jimmy and Derek??
But it also kind of sucks because chances are that the days I am at church I will be doing Kids Klub and I will only be in the service for the first song and that is all I will get of church.

I guess it will be fine (or F.I.N.E. LOL, just kidding)
Besides there is always BOWWOWS and Street Church
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As opposed to a theater

Some people said they loved it, some said they liked it, some said they don't like it (or they at least need to get used to some of the differences)

Personally, I love it
Yea at first glance it may look fancy, with all the chandeliers, but when you see them swinging you either think "oh boy" or "hey, it's New Heights"
But that's not what caught my attention... It felt more communityish and less performancyish. Yea it's true I am a lot closer to the people beside me, but I'm not claustrophobic and I like to cuddle, so I'm okay with cuddling with my neighbor's elbow (Okay, maybe that was a bit hyperbolish -- and yes I'm having an "ishy" moment).
What I also find is that people are pretty critical at first, they always seem to say exactly what's on their mind, especially when they don't like something... And it's probably pretty true that a lot of what's on people's mind is negative, unfortunately.
I'm saying something positive, I prefer to be that way.
So yea I loved it, I also like that I can see more different people... Everybody is not so far away... So when the service is over they don`t all seem to flood out at once... With such a small lobby area, you have people congregating in the banquet hall.

Now if any of that made sense to you, congrats we are on the same wave length... If you raised your eyebrow at anything I said... Well sucks to be cause I had fun writing it all... So suck it up princess :-)
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You would have had to read a blog I posted a couple days ago, about a pick-up line some guy gave me, in order to understand this post.

I saw that guy again today, at church!
If you saw me and was wondering who the guy sitting beside me was, that was him. His name is Taz.
It was weird.
When he walked in it took me a second to place where I had seen him.... Kinda funny, kinda weird... hey at least he's Christian, or so he says, and if he uses that kind of pick-up line ("so are you married or anything?") he may not be looking for justr one thing.
hmm??

It was his first time to New Heights, he loved it...
Apparently he's new to Mission, he said he was from Vancouver...
He was with some friends that I didn't recognize either, so I don't know if it was there first time to New Heights.

Or maybe I've just picked up a new staulker...... hope not :-) Creepy...
Naw, he seemed nice enough
Although I presume he has a bit of a shady history... because he did seem to know what Susan was talking about when she was talking about the 4tha nd 5th steps...
is it just creepy that I paid that much attention, and tried to read who this guy was without him saying very much about himself???
I'd rather think of it as me trying to be observant and stay away from weirdos, and crack addicts and the like.
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Check them out at my Fotopage.
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Grab a calculator
Make sure you press the equals button after every step.

1. Grab a calculator. (you won't be able to do this one in your head)
2. Key in the first three digits of your phone number (NOT the area code)
3. Multiply by 80
4. Add 1
5. Multiply by 250
6. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number
7. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number again.
8. Subtract 250
9. Divide number by 2 Do you recognize the answer?

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resolutions... smeshoulisions

I don't really have one, the only thing I can think of is to get out of debt as soon as possible... that means I need to work my little arse off (well, it's not actually that little). I'm not actually in debt yet, but wait until the 4th, after I pay for my classes. then i get to be about $1200 in debt, a debt with a huge interest rate at that. yay for credit cards and overdraft.
Oh boy, I can't wait........
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I was checking up on how much it would cost to fly from here to toronto. Did you know that right now it is more expensive to fly from Abbotsfor to Totronto than it does to fly from Vancouver to Toronto?

To fly West Jet it averages out to be about $715. But to fly from Vancouver it's just under $700.
I always thought that it was cheaper to fly westjet... but apparently it's not
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